“Open up, O heavens, and pour out your righteousness. Let the earth open wide so salvation and righteousness can sprout up together. I, the Lord, created them. Isaiah 45:8

More and more I understand the system in which I work, what I have to work with, the others I have to work for, The request for God to pour out salvation and righteousness resonates with me.

This not about church. I live and work in a broken society:- health, education, morals, family life. Everything is broken. I too am broken and I work among broken people. All of us different in what part of us is broken. I realize that unless I am able to accept this, I will constantly frustrate myself. I will forever be disappointed in how things unfold.

We do not seem to want to see eye to eye, to compromise. Compromise here does not mean lowering your standards but understanding that sometimes and in some things we can yield a little. We take pleasure in tearing others down, in not helping, and most of all watching others suffer or go through painful situations while we watch and I dare say gloat. It seems we have become a society of fiends, without compassion for others.

Anyone reading has ever felt that way? Like nobody really cares? It is not that their anger or apathy is necessarily directed at me. It is just that it is too obvious. It makes me feel like the psalmist when he says that there is no help in us. So I say “Open up, O heavens, pour out your righteousness on me. Let me open my heart wide so salvation and righteousness can sprout up together within me”. I need it, not just for myself but so I can share with others.

Sometimes we need an extra push, an extra dose of something to get us through various situations. That extra something is God pouring God’s spirit into us. Many times it is waiting in silence and seeking God’s leading. You realize you have to draw second and first gear to climb the hill to get to the other side of the situation. When you reach for the gear stick, you realize God is already holding it. You don’t always feel him at the same time, but when you reflect you recognize that God was there through it all.
The song Through it all by Andre Crouch comes to mind. It says
“I’ve had many tears and sorrows
I’ve had questions for tomorrow
There’s been times I didn’t know right from wrong
But in every situation God gave me blessed consolation
That my trials came to only make me strong

I’ve been to lots of places,
I’ve seen a lot of faces
But there were times that I felt so all alone
But in my lonely hours
Yes, those precious lonely hours
Jesus lets me know that I was His own
That’s the reason I say

Through it all
Through it all
I’ve learned to trust in Jesus
I’ve learned to trust in God
Let me tell you that

Through it all, oh
Through it all, I’ve learned to depend upon His Word”

As I sing (dying with laughter) but you know what I mean, I realize that it is not hard to feel alone and that many times you can only depend on yourself and God. This is not depression, but a feeling of unrealized expectations. Maybe things could have been different if… You resolve to do what you must, by yourself and for yourself. You overthink everything. Everything is nuanced. You are not so sure what is the best thing to do. You are not second guessing yourself, but at the same time you wonder if you have taken the right path. Comfort is far from you.

I see this in others, the disappointment of persons turning their backs on them; the hurt of having to walk alone particularly if you made a poor decision. Looking on is painful. But struggle on we must.

We pray that we may feel God ever present in this troublous life. We pray that

“Eternal Light, shine into our hearts; Eternal Goodness, deliver us from evil; Eternal Power, be
our support;
Eternal Wisdom, scatter the darkness of our ignorance; Eternal Pity, have mercy upon us;
That with all our heart and mind and soul and strength we may seek your face and be brought by your infinite mercy to your holy presence; through Jesus Christ our Lord.” Amen.

Where God is all is well. All will be well. All manner of things will be well.